I just became aware of this website: www.purelifeministries.org
Here is a powerful testimony from a woman who realized she had made her husband her idol. This is something we are all prone to do or capable of as women. Like me, she is grateful for what happened in her life because it has brought her so much closer to the Lord. Check out the other inspirational stories and resources on their website!
by Amy Meyer Allen
Here is an excerpt from chapter one of my book, "Snapshots of a Redeemed Marriage." Email me if you'd like to have a free copy emailed to you. firstname.lastname@example.org
I considered myself to be a pretty liberal woman. I accepted Tim’s interest in looking at Playboy magazines ever since his Naval Academy days; I even allowed them on our coffee table. I didn’t even think twice when he and a friend visiting from Omaha went to a strip club. But this was too much—a picture he had posted on the Internet from a camping trip we went on together for my birthday a year prior. He was tastefully posing naked in front of a waterfall. It was my picture of him. Now he had perverted it—barely attempting to blur out his face. I felt sick.
I never did have pity for women who had been cheated on by a spouse or boyfriend. I considered it a character flaw if a woman stayed with her man. “Dump the jerk as fast as you can, and move on” would have been my advice. Now, being confronted head-on with that very situation, I realized life isn’t so black and white. Mix in emotions, dreams, feelings of betrayal and love, and it is more a muddy brown. I journaled some of my feelings:
July 6, 1997
Tim is going through a tough time right now, and I don’t know how to help him. It seems like the more I try to get close to him and help him, the more he wants to run away. I think he sees me as his ball and chain. I’m tying him down. I hate that. I don’t want to be anyone’s ball and chain. I want him to be happy and fulfilled and in love with me. Maybe that’s the problem. I’m trying too hard. I can’t force anyone to love me. I’m just scared. I’m afraid that if I leave him alone he’ll find someone else. I’m confused. I don’t know what the right thing to do is. I do know that I’m feeling miserable and sick to my stomach and making myself get zits on my face. But I don’t think the right thing to do is avoidance. I feel like we need to talk, but it’s so hard. I’m afraid of what his answers will be. I don’t want him to leave me, but I don’t want him to stay just out of guilt. I have never felt so out of control. This is something he has to decide. Our future is up to him and what he decides. Maybe that’s why I’m so miserable. I can’t control how Tim feels about me. And if I try to, it just makes it worse. But this is my life, too – I need to know what’s going on. I need some answers. I haven’t felt this hurt and confused since Tim broke up with me in high school. I know I just need to leave it in God’s hands, but it’s hard. I’m afraid.
I was born in 1970 in Omaha, Nebraska. Although I went to church all my life, I didn't make Jesus Lord of my life until I was 29 years old. My real relationship with Him began when my marriage fell apart.